has never been afraid to share her personal life
on camera, but the same can no longer be said about her husband. The candid actress opened up to ET about how their reality show True Tori
has helped her heal, why Dean McDermott
will not return should there be a season three and how all of this has affected their children.
"The first season obviously was about putting our truth out there and telling my story about what was happening with our relationship after the fallout of my husband's infidelity," she says. "This season is more about rebuilding the relationship and working on it."
Tori and Dean
have shared every painstaking detail in that process, including intense therapy sessions in front of cameras. But with season two of their Lifetime reality show coming to a close on Dec. 9, if there's a season three, Dean will not be involved.
"The journey has definitely been cathartic for me," Tori tells ET. "My husband and I have different views. For him, he kind of wanted his privacy back. For me, I enjoyed the process." The 41-year-old adds, "I respect him and his privacy and I understand it’s not for everyone."
Tori, who is the daughter of legendary TV producer Aaron Spelling, has spent the better part of her life in the limelight. While public scrutiny is undoubtedly an effect of growing up in the public eye, Tori explains that the reality show has helped give her a voice to dispel any misconceptions about her and her family.
"For me its healing to be able to say if you want the truth, if you want to know what’s really happening, don’t read the magazines, don’t read the gossip, watch the show," she says.
"I used to get people say, 'Wow you're perfect-- your lives, your marriage, your children, your work-- everything is just perfect,'" she explains. "That was such a hard pedestal to be put upon and I used to think how do I maintain that? And inside I was just cracking. And now it's all been put out there, there's a huge crack in it... They know everything and for me it was a huge relief."
As for whether Tori and Dean are at all concerned about exposing their children Liam (age 7), Stella (age 6), Hattie (age 3) and Finn (age 2) to the cameras, she explains the kids "always come first."
"If at any point the kids say, 'I don't want to do that anymore. I don't want to be on camera,' it all stops," she says. "It all goes away."
The mother of four also reveals that the kids aren't allowed to watch everything on the show, specifically their parents' therapy sessions.
"When they're adults I have no problem going back to them and telling them what happened-- they don’t know about the affair," she reveals. "I want to be able to sit down with them at one point and say, 'Dad and I had a really hard year, we worked on our relationship and we survived it. We're survivors and we're still together and we're happier and stronger than we were. And we documented our lives because we thought it could help others and this was our process.'"
No word yet whether True Tori will be renewed by Lifetime for season three but Tori is hopeful.
"It's been a great journey and I learned so much from it," she says. "I've grown so much from it as a woman and a mom and I have a lot more to share."