For us, comparing Chris Evans and Chris Pratt is like comparing sexy apples to sexy oranges. Except both the apple and orange play superheroes in Marvel movies. And both happen to be named Chris. OK, so they have some things in common. Still, we’d never even consider picking one over the other.
But they did this to themselves.
“Well, well, well @prattprattpratt, looks like our teams are going into battle,” Chris Evans tweeted after the Seahawks made it to the Super Bowl. “For the next 2 weeks, you are not my friend, you are my enemy.” Then a wager was made:
NEWS: Chris Pratt is really, really good at French braiding hair! Who knew?
Let’s take a second to recognize exactly how sweet that bet is. What great guys. OK, moment’s over, now back to the business at hand: So, which Chris should you be rooting for? Let’s break it down.
SENSE OF HUMOR:
Winner: Chris Pratt. Chris Evans is funny, but he ditched comedy a while ago in favor of more dramatic fare. Even his Marvel movie is more serious than Pratt’s Guardians of the Galaxy. Though, if Cap were performing stand-up sets between S.H.I.E.L.D. missions, Pratt would still win based on seven seasons worth of Andy Dwyer.
Winner: Chris Evans. If we were going based just off Marvel movies, it’s a tie. But Chris Evans has been doing gratuitous shirtlessness for years: In the first Captain America, in a bunch of rom-coms you might not have seen but should Netflix, in Gucci ads, in that infamous Flaunt magazine spread.
MOVIE STAR CRED:
Winner: Chris Pratt. At one point, it seemed like Evans would have the more movie star-friendly career. Then Pratt jumped from Parks and Rec to the lead of Marvel franchise. Then Jurassic World. Who knows what’s next? By 2020, Chris Pratt might be cast in every movie. Plus, Guardians had the second biggest box office of 2014 (Captain America: The Winter Soldier had the third).
Winner: It's a tie. Because who can pick when they’re both using their super powers to do such wonderful things like visiting children in the hospital? Or escorting Betty White to the stage at award shows? Or being a great dad who loves his kid? Not us.
So in the end, who’s the winner? All of us who get to live in a world with such amazing Chrises. (But technically, we guess, Chris Pratt. Go Seahawks! BUT WE STILL LOVE YOU, CHRIS EVANS.)
Here's a complete list of the most talked about celebs this week on Tumblr:
And check out which team other celebrities are rooting for this Super Bowl: