Julia Louis-Dreyfus Celebrates Her 'Last F**kable Day' with Tina Fey, Patricia Arquette and Amy Schumer

by Jackie Willis 9:24 AM PDT, April 22, 2015
Photo: Comedy Central

Amy Schumer got Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Tina Fey and Patricia Arquette to use their comedic skills to send a statement to Hollywood.

In a profanity-laden sketch (NSFW language ahead!) for Inside Amy's season 2 premiere, Schumer runs into the Hollywood heavyweights having an feast in the park. When asked what they're doing there, the women explain that they're celebrating Louis-Dreyfus' "last f**kable day."

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"In every actress' life, the media decides when you finally reach the point when you're not believably f**kable anymore," Fey, 44, explains.

Elaborating, the women admit that "no one overtly tells you" when you're no longer "f**kable," but the signs are there. Fey gives an example, "You know how Sally Field was Tom Hanks' love interest in Punchline and then 20 minutes later she was his mom in Forrest Gump?"

The Emmy and Oscar-winning women then reveal to Schumer that they all lost out to the part of Mrs. Claus to 45-year-old Jennifer Lopez. "She'll be good," Louis-Dreyfus, 54, says.

Arquette, 47, says another way you know you're no longer "f**kable" is when they recast a movie you're in with a "sexier" and "younger" actress. "They're remaking Boyhood with Selena Gomez," the Oscar winner announces to the ladies.

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Not understanding, Schumer insists that all three ladies are still "so f**kable."

"No one was more surprised than me that they let me stay f**kable throughout my forties, and the fact that it continued into my fifties," the Veep star brags. "It was just like, 'Thanks, but...' I thought that Us Weekly had made some kind of clerical error or something."

Refusing to accept this, the 33-year-old comedian asks if anything can be done. "You could try, but it only makes it worse. Like those Real Housewives!" Fey explains. "They try to look young, but then they end up looking like a purse that melted in a car accident. They look like when a kid draws a face on its hand."

So, when is a man's "last f**kable day?" Never!

Arquette responds, "Honey, men don't have that day."

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The sketch ends with Louis-Dreyfus chugging a melted pint of ice cream (since she's no longer f**kable, why not?), and being pushed out into the river as Fey lights her cigar with a Katniss-like flaming bow and arrow.

The "Last F**kable Day" isn't the only sketch from Inside Amy that has people talking. Schumer and former Good Wife star Josh Charles did a perfect spoof of Friday Night Lights and addressed the serious topic of rape allegations among athletes.

Prior to her show's season 2 premiere, ET interviewed the hilarious Schumer about her MTV Movie Awards hosting duties. Check out that funny chat, below.