Ronda Rousey Tearfully Reveals She Was Suicidal After Her Stunning UFC Upset to Holly Holm

by Antoinette Bueno 10:14 AM PST, February 16, 2016
Playing Ronda Rousey Tearfully Reveals She Was Suicidal After Her Stunning UFC Upset to Holly Holm

Ronda Rousey definitely took her UFC loss to Holly Holm last November hard.

In a new interview with Ellen DeGeneres, airing Monday, the 29-year-old UFC fighter revealed she was suicidal after the big upset.

"Honestly, like, my thought, in the medical room, down in the corner, I was like, 'What am I anymore if I'm not this?'" Rousey told DeGeneres, fighting back tears. "And I was literally sitting there and thinking about killing myself, and that exact second I'm like, 'I'm nothing, what do I do anymore, and no one gives a s**t about me anymore without this.'"

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Rousey credited her boyfriend, fellow UFC fighter Travis Browne, for helping her deal with the devastating loss.

"To be honest, I looked up, and I saw my man Travis was standing up there, and I looked up at him, and I was like, 'I need to have his babies, I need to stay alive,'" she laughed. "Really, that was it. ... I was meant to have him when I was at my lowest, for sure. I don't know if I would have made it without him."

These days, Rousey looks back on her loss with a more positive outlook.

"Maybe, just winning all the time is not good for everyone," she reflected. "Maybe my role -- everyone has their moment of picking themselves off the floor -- I'd gone through several of mine, but no one had actually seen me go through it. And maybe I just had to be that example of picking myself up the floor for everyone. Maybe that's what I'm meant for."

"I really do believe I'm still undefeated because being defeated is a choice," she added. "Everybody has losses in their life, but I choose to always be undefeated."

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On a happier note, Rousey couldn't be more pleased with her new super sexy 2016 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue cover, in which she dons body paint instead of an actual bikini.

More from @si_swimsuit - pic by @fredericpinet bodypaint and makeup by @joannegair

A photo posted by rondarousey (@rondarousey) on

Although she did admit to some difficulties with her "suit," specifically when it came to using the toilet.

"You have to dab, not wipe," Rousey laughed. "I didn't want to, like, take off a tiger whisker."

Check out the video below for more on Rousey's jaw-dropping Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue cover!