If you don’t like the sex that’s happening on Shonda Rhimes shows, turn the damn channel.
Because the brains behind Grey’s Anatomy and Scandal and the executive producer of How to Get Away With Murder isn’t going to censor herself for you. She’s especially not having it if you have issues with the “gay scenes” on her shows.
That much she made clear on Twitter over the weekend:
Ummm, aren’t the sex scenes half the reason we watch a Shondaland show in the first place?! It’s the closet any of us are going to get to having sex with the president. Plus, it’s not like sex on her shows is anything new.
Though you could argue it’s only gotten hotter... Hallelujah!
Grey’s Anatomy Starts With a Bang: Literally. The first scene of the first episode started with Meredith (Ellen Pompeo) waking up after having sex with Derek (Patrick Dempsey). On the floor. A full on one night stand in the first minute of a new show. Steamy.
What Happens Behind Closed Doors: Much of the sex in the first few seasons started with a make out session, turned into some heavy petting, a bra came off and a door closed. Or we cut to another scene. Either way, we didn’t get to see any of the good stuff.
Shondaland Goes Full on “O” Face: That PG-13 stuff didn’t last for long. Before you knew it, the doctors over at Seattle Grace were going at it, moaning and grunting and we were seeing it all. Well, not all. This is network TV, people, not porn.
Talk Dirty to Me: MerDer & Co. kept pushing the boundaries of primetime penetration, paving the filthy, filthy way for what would come on Scandal and ultimately HTGAWM. Like a season four sex scene that found Mark (Eric Dane) and Callie (Sara Ramirex) having sex while fantasizing about a threesome. It gets very specific.
Sex Scenes Get a Little More Scandalous: Everything that went down on Grey’s looked like hand holding compared to what Scandal would offer: Specifically, between can’t-keep-their-hands-and-mouths-and-other-things-off-each-other couple Olivia Pope (Kerry Washington) and President Fitzgerald Grant (Tony Goldwyn). This was not your mother’s Shondaland — but let’s get real, your mom loved it too.
Coming Out of the Closet: Things only got nastier in Scandal’s second season. Like the scene where Olivia and Fitz have angry closet sex after his newborn son’s christening and then Fitz tells Olivia that even though he can’t control his erection around her, he doesn’t love her. Which is a pretty brutal thing to say.
Don’t Talk With Your Mouth Full: If Scandal revolutionized the way any one thing is shown on TV, it’s his and hers oral sex: Fitz’s head is always wandering...down there during his lovemaking. Mellie’s (Bellamy Young) daughter walked in on the First Lady “on her knees with Uncle Andrew.” Apparently it’s happening all the time in the White House.
Huck and Quinn Get It On: And even though no one wanted to see it, or asked to see it, or could mentally process having seen it, we saw it. It started with face licking, which turned into tight ripping, which turned into, well, see above. OUR EYES.
The Jake of It All: Considering the two were the stars of their very own sex tape before they even met each others parents, Jake (Scott Foley) and Olivia’s sex life was always very MerDer. Then this season came around and Jake’s saying things like, “I’m the one you like to ride. I’m the one who makes you moan. I’m the one who reaches you in places he can’t begin to touch.” OK, calm down there, tiger.
Annalise Keating’s Dirty Little Secret: Which brings us to now, and How to Get Away With Murder. If you were wondering whether Shonda’s newest show would carry on her sexy mantle, it only took a student walking in on Annalise (Viola Davis) receiving cunnilingus from a cop who is not her husband to know the answer is HELL YES.
How to Get Away With Butt Stuff: A new series in the Shonda empire means a new envelope to push in the sex department. Enter Connor Walsh (Jack Falahee), who came out of the gate with a whole different kind of lingus. And whereas Scandal's gay sex took place between married husbands, Connor had another steamy sex scene with another random dude a few episodes later that ended with his conquest saying, “He did this thing to my ass that made my eyes water.” What does that even mean?!
One Night in Paris: Just when you thought HTGAWM had made the brains of everyone on the FCC melt, Scandal reminded us why it was the sexiest sex show about sex on TV with a little thing called “Eiffel Towering.” Good luck explaining that one to your parents.
We literally cannot even begin to imagine what we could see next. But we will wait. And we will watch. And when it happens? Bye, Felicia! We will die and go to heaven! Per usual.
“I don't know why this kind of hate is out there. Ugh. #onelove. At least in Shondaland.” Shonda concluded on Twitter. Preach.
Entertainment Tonight will have more on Shonda’s sexy shows this week, so tune in!
And it's a good thing the Grey’s cast is good at sex, because they’re horrible doctors: