How 'New Girl' Should Handle Zooey Deschanel's Pregnancy

by John Boone 11:28 AM PST, January 13, 2015
Photo: FOX

Zooey Deschanel is pregnant! How great! Her New Girl alter ego, Jess, is not pregnant. At least, she wasn’t pregnant the last time we checked in on her. Less great!

Here’s how New Girl will likely incorporate Zooey’s pregnancy: They won’t. If she’s showing during filming, they will cover her bump with big purses, lots of layers, maybe Schmidt’s fat suit, and other hijinx. But we think they should embrace that bun in Jess’ oven.

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Why not add an adorkable baby to the loft? Jess and her roommates have already gone through four seasons worth of 30-something shenanigans. If they throw a baby into the mix, it will amp up the drama and create tons of new problems for the gang to navigate.

But who would her baby daddy be? Let’s look at the possibilities:

Photo: FOX

Nick: This one would take a little fancy footwork. The audience already suffered through so much on-again, off-again drama with Jess and Nick (Jake Johnson) that it has killed any joy we had of seeing them together. But there is still chemistry there (it’s palpable!) and Nick is one of the stars of the show, so you know he’ll be around for nine months of pregnancy. It could work. Or it could completely crash and burn and ruin the show forever.

Likelihood of Baby Daddy-dom: 95 percent

Photo: FOX

Ryan: Of all Jess’ ex-boyfriends — Nick excluded — the hot British teacher (Julian Morris) is our favorite. He’s sweet, he’s quirky, did we mention he’s hot? But how long will he stick around? That’s the rub. If Ryan is the dad, he’d need to become a series regular. Which we would love, for what it’s worth.

Likelihood of Baby Daddy-dom: 75 percent

Photo: FOX

Coach: The O.G. roommate (Damon Wayans Jr.) returned to have a brief, unexpected fling with Cece (Hannah Simone), so we know he’s not opposed to getting down with his BFF’s exes. And there’s some sexual tension there between Jess and Coach. Kinda. Right? Maybe?

Likelihood of Baby Daddy-dom: 40 percent

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Photo: FOX

Winston: We know Winston (Lamorne Morris) has had girlfriends in the past, but we're still pretty positive he’s actually asexual. There’s less than zero sexual chemistry between Winston and Jess, but with all that said: We’d love to see how the New Girl writers would explain this. And we’d love to see how the other roommates would react. Because...WTF?

Likelihood of Baby Daddy-dom: 10 percent

Photo: FOX

Schmidt (Max Greenfield): That would be wrong. Just so, so wrong.

Likelihood of Baby Daddy-dom: -100 percent

Or maybe Cece and Jess will decide they don’t need a man in their life and decide to raise a baby together via artificial insemination. Heck, it could be Outside Dave’s! The possibilities are endless. Guess we’ll just have to wait and see...

In the meantime, get the scoop on mama-to-be Zooey’s first pregnancy!