Acting as Alex Rodriguez's spokesperson during the ESPY Awards on Wednesday, Ken Jeong jokingly read a fake public apology on behalf of the MLB star, which apologized for everything except his admitted steroid use.
"He has returned this spring humbled and focused, so he has hired me to make this statement of apology on his behalf," Jeong said, standing onstage between A-Rod and ESPY host Joel McHale.
A-Rod is back in the New York Yankees' lineup after being suspended for the entire 2014 season.
"To my fans, fans of baseball, and to fans of fair play everywhere, I'm sorry," Jeong read. "I'm sorry that Jon Snow died on the season finale of Game of Thrones, and I'm sorry I just spoiled that for some of you."
In between the jokes, Jeong and McHale, who share the screen on Community, engaged in playful banter with McHale pointing out that "Alex might have something a little more obvious to apologize for."
The obvious apology of course never came, as A-Rod had already issued a serious mea culpa at the beginning of the season.
What he did apologize for was the California drought, the economic collapse in Greece, Shaquille O'Neal's Icy Hot commercials, the network cancellation and subsequent web revival of Community, gluten, the New York Knicks and fans of The Hangover.
"To anyone who has watched The Hangover, I'm sorry you had to see Ken Jeong's penis," Jeong read with disdain. "It's tiny. It's grossly misshapen. It's unpatriotic."