EXCLUSIVE: Amanda Stanton Is Writing a Memoir: 'It Feels Good to Stick Up For Yourself'

amanda_stanton_instagram
Instagram

The reality star also tells ET what she's looking for in a relationship.

"It's not completely about [my relationships]," Stanton told ET's Lauren Zima at the Bachelor in Paradise season four finale taping last month. "But there's going to be a little bit in there." 

While Stanton told ET at the Bachelor End of Summer Party benefiting Restore Dignity last week that she and Hayes are still "friendly" (the two later went head-to-head on Twitter), she and Murray had a difficult split after ending their engagement last December. Murray was also featured in Andi Dorfman's 2016 tell-allIt's Not Okay -- but Stanton says her book will be more "positive." 

"I've been writing it for a little over a year now, and it's just been therapeutic... it's been my therapy, in a way," she shared. "I still am a very positive person and whatever relationship drama I’m going through, I always do try to be positive. At the end of the day, my book is going to be more positive than some tell-all trashing people." 

The reality star is, however, learning to stand up for herself. 

"It feels good sometimes to stick up for yourself, so I'm learning how to do it, even though it's hard for me," she admitted. "I think I've just avoided conflict, and it's something that I still hate."

And after three seasons trying to find love on TV, Stanton, who is also working on a kids clothing line, said season four of Bachelor in Paradise was her "last time."

"[I wouldn't do Paradise, Winter Games or The Bachelorette] after seeing all these guys. It scares me," she insisted. "I'm really done." 

"Definitely after what I went through with Josh, I'm a little guarded with [who meets my daughters]," she said, adding that Hayes never met her girls. "Right now I'm so done dating in Bachelor Nation. I really want to date a normal guy. I want a normal life. I want to get married, I want to have more kids, and I just don't know if I would find that within the franchise." 

The mother of two is instead looking for the kind of love that her friend, Lauren Bushnell, found with Devin Antin after splitting with Bachelor Ben Higgins. 

"I love him. I totally approve. He's a normal guy," she confessed. "He's not part of the franchise, which I think is kind of refreshing sometimes, when you come out of such a public relationship, to date someone who's not in the spotlight. She's really happy, so I'm happy for her." 

As for what Stanton is looking for, she told ET at the Paradise finale taping that she wants a "partner in crime and best friend."

"I really just want a normal life. I want to stay home with my kids and make dinner," she shared. "I want to give Kinsley and Charlie a brother or sister...I want someone who's ready to settle down and wants that normal life and isn't looking for fame."