The women co-starred on the original Nickelodeon series from 2007 to 2012.
Jennette McCurdy is opening up about her friendship with Miranda Cosgrove. In her new memoir, I'm Glad My Mom Died, the 30-year-old former actress reveals her first impression of her iCarly co-star and shares why she didn't sign on to be a part of its recent reboot. The show ran for six seasons, which aired between 2007 and 2012.
After landing the role of Sam Puckett when she was 14, McCurdy was "fascinated" to learn of Cosgrove's "independence," something McCurdy wasn't accustomed to, given her abusive relationship with her now-late mom.
"She walked alone to pick up food from a different nearby restaurant each day -- alone! What’s that like? Then I’d always hear when she came walking back into the studio because she’d be playing Gwen Stefani or Avril Lavigne from her Sidekick. I knew of these artists, but Mom didn’t allow me to listen to them because she said their music might make me wanna 'do bad things,'" McCurdy, who grew up Mormon, writes of Cosgrove. "On set, Miranda said cuss words like 's**t' and 'a**,' and she took the Lord’s name in vain at least fifty times a day. Mom warned me not to get too close to Miranda because she doesn’t believe in God."
The then-teens quickly developed a friendship, mostly through AIM.
"Miranda and I spent hours talking every day on it," McCurdy recalls. "... Even though in person Miranda seemed shy and quiet, she had a distinct and hilarious personality through her written words. So many of the things she said made me laugh. Her way of observing things -- people, habits, human nature. I loved her. And I was so excited we were becoming friends."
As iCarly's success continued, so too did McCurdy and Cosgrove's friendship.
"My friendship with Miranda has been a source of camaraderie and emotional support," McCurdy writes. "I’m friends with the rest of the cast too, but my connection with Miranda is different and special. We Skype on the weekends and see movies at ArcLight after work."
When iCarly came to an end, McCurdy worried that it'd mark the end of her friendship with Cosgrove too. That fear really came into focus when the women shot their final scene together through tears.
"The reason I’m crying is that I don’t know what will become of my friendship with Miranda. We’ve gotten so close. Like sisters, but without the passive-aggression and weird tensions," McCurdy writes. "I have my judgments around female friendships being catty and petty and backstabby, but that couldn’t be further from the truth with Miranda. With Miranda, it’s always been so easy. Our friendship is pure."
McCurdy soon realized, however, that her fears were unfounded.
"There was no need to worry about context; our friendship has gotten stronger since iCarly ended," she writes. "We hang out three or four times a week. Usually one of the nights is a sleepover."
In fact, their bond remained so close that McCurdy eventually opened up to Cosgrove about her struggles with anorexia and bulimia.
"Miranda’s been very supportive. I appreciate her support but it’s also difficult at times," McCurdy writes. "Before Miranda knew about this stuff, when bulimia was my secret, I could get through the ups and downs on my own. I was the only person I had to be accountable to, the only person I would disappoint. But now that she’s in on the secret, I can tell she’s hyperaware of my eating tendencies. She’s constantly observing. I’m not just disappointing myself with my slips, but her too."
As close as the women once were, though, they did start to "drift apart" as they entered their late 20s.
"At the beginning of the decade, the people I was close to seemed like friends for life, people I could never imagine not seeing every day. But life happens. Love happens. Loss happens," McCurdy writes. "Change and growth happen at different paces for different people, and sometimes the paces just don’t line up. It’s devastating if I think too much about it, so I usually don’t."
That change in their dynamic came around the same time that an iCarly reboot was in the works. Cosgrove wanted McCurdy to jump on board, but the latter actress had expressed embarrassment about her time on the series.
On a phone call, McCurdy insisted, "Miranda, I’m not doing the reboot. There’s nothing you can say to convince me."
"She tells me she thinks the reboot could be an opportunity for all of us in the cast to 'get back out there,' maybe get some other opportunities from it," McCurdy recalls of Cosgrove.
When that tactic didn't work, Cosgrove reminded McCurdy that "it's really good money."
"But there are things more important than money. And my mental health and happiness fall under that category,'" McCurdy recalls telling her. "There’s a moment of silence. It’s one of those rare moments where I feel like I didn’t say too much, or too little. I feel like I represented myself accurately and there’s nothing I would change about the way I said it. I feel proud. We wrap up our conversation, promising to keep in touch, and hang up."
When ET spoke to Cosgrove last year, she reacted to McCurdy's decision not to reprise her role in the reboot.
"We all really wanted Jennette to be a part of the show in real life, but she's just doing other things and we're really happy for her," Cosgrove said at the time, adding that McCurdy would be welcomed onto the reboot "anytime."
I'm Glad My Mom Died is out now.
ET, Nickelodeon and Paramount+ are all subsidiaries of Paramount.
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