"Hiddleswift has called it Hiddlesplits," he announced on Wednesday's Late Show. "I'm especially sad about this news because their love was in the press so much, I thought I was part of it. In a way, it feels like they broke up with me."
Colbert than grabbed his stringless guitar and proclaimed, "I'm so upset, I did what Taylor does when she goes through a breakup. I wrote a song about it."
"Taylor, Tom and me we were a happy couple of three, but now they said goodbye and I just want to cry," the late night host crooned. "How could you do this to me? Think of all our memories. Like kissing on that rock or climbing on that rock or walking on that rock. Man, we spent a lot of time on rocks. And sure I wasn't there, but Photoshop don't care."
Colbert concluded his ballad by announcing that he was moving on with Orlando Bloom and Katy Perry. "My heart is on the floor. I've got 'Bad Blood' with amore. So, goodbye Tom and goodbye Tay Tay. Don't worry about me I'll be OK K," he sang. "Because I've found a brand new love that will never go kaboom. Goodbye, Colbiddleswift. Hello, ColKatlando Bloom."
Bette Midler also joked that she would be penning some lyrics following Swift's recent breakup. "Taylor Swift and Tom Hiddleston broke up? Wouldn’t it be kinda funny if I logged off and wrote a song about it before she got the chance?" she tweeted.
Taylor Swift & Tom Hiddleston broke up? Wouldn’t it be kinda funny if I logged off & wrote a song about it before she got the chance?