Howard Stern Spills All the Details About Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux's 'Top Secret' Wedding

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Howard Stern just dropped plenty of details from inside Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux's A-list, surprise wedding last Wednesday.
The 61-year-old radio and television personality was a guest at the wedding, and on his SiriusXM show on Monday, revealed that he delivered a speech ribbing the star couple. Stern admitted he didn't want to do a speech, but couldn't say no when the groom himself asked him to.
"So I got up and bitched about that they took away my cell phone when I came in," Stern said. "I was outraged. I said, 'I don't want to take a picture of you guys, why can't I have a cell phone?' The irony is I've been away on vacation with those two, and they take pictures every f**king minute. They're constantly shooting pictures, but if I take a picture, it's like I'm committing a sin."
Eventually, Stern calmed down enough to compliment Theroux's mother on "raising such a wonderful son" -- but most importantly, he joked, a good-looking one too.
"I love him," Stern said bluntly of Theroux. "I love him and I told Jennifer she deserves a guy like this. Because, after all, she's been very sweet and generous with us, but Justin and his body. His abs, his ass. Look at him. I'm giddy over him!"
Still, there was one actor at the wedding that Stern said trumped even Theroux in the looks department -- 38-year-old Orlando Bloom.
"This f**king guy. He's like better-looking than Johnny Depp, Brad Pitt, and Tom Cruise all rolled into one," he boldly said of the British Lord of the Rings star. ... "[During my speech, I said] 'Orlando, can you come over and take off your shirts and pants so people can look at you?'"
As for other celeb guests, Stern revealed that another frequent vacation buddy of the newlyweds, Jimmy Kimmel, actually officiated the wedding.
"He did a beautiful job," Stern complimented the late night show host. "I didn't think he'd get through it. Jimmy's still depressed about that lion getting killed over in Africa."
"Ellen [DeGeneres] was mad that I made fun of Jimmy for crying," he added.
WATCH: Jimmy Kimmel Chokes Up Over the Death of Cecil the Lion
Aniston, 46, and Theroux -- who turns 44 today -- tied the knot at their home in Bel Air, California, last Wednesday in a secret ceremony disguised as an early birthday party for the Leftovers actor. Watch the video below for more on the couple's big day.