Inside Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds' Not 'So Perfect' Life: 8 Things We Learned
Blake Lively is getting candid about family life with husband Ryan Reynolds and their two daughters, 2-year-old James and 10-month-old Ines.
The 29-year-old actress covers Glamour's September issue, and in a deeply personal Q&A, discusses everything from her not exactly "perfect" life to how she and Reynolds are raising their kids in such a political environment.
Read on for eight things we've learned about Lively when it comes to her roles as wife and mother.
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1. Reynolds hates the word "bossy" when it comes to describing women
Lively says both she and and her husband are very careful when it comes to avoiding sexist language with their daughters.
"With my husband, I’m lucky to have someone who is so conscious," Lively says after pointing out how she's more aware these days of sexist descriptions in scripts. "My husband was like, 'Why do I always say he?' And I said, 'That’s what we’re taught.' So he'll pick up, like a caterpillar, and instead of saying, 'What’s his name?' he'll say, 'What’s her name?' Or we’ve joked that my daughter is bossy. But my husband said, 'I don't ever want to use that word again. You’ve never heard a man called bossy.'"
"There would never be any negative connotation for a man being a boss, so to add a negative connotation on a woman being bossy? It’s belittling," she adds. "And it doesn't encourage them to be a boss."
But when it comes to raising their kids, Lively admits that despite appearances, she doesn't have it all figured out. The former Gossip Girl star says she has "no idea" how to protect James' sense of confidence as she grows up.
"So do I know how to be the best parent for a daughter? No, I have no idea," she acknowledges. "All I can do is share what I’m thinking -- and learn from others. ... I do know that I have to watch her and listen to her and not project any of my own insecurities or struggles on her."
2. Lively and Reynolds never work at the same time
Lively notes that the couple is always family first, even when it comes to their busy careers.
"We don't work at the same time," she shares about why she'll be based in Vancouver for the entire Deadpool shoot. "We’re here as a family, then we’ll pack up, and I'll go do a couple movies."
"I admire people who find that what fulfills them is their art or their work, but what fulfills both me and my husband is our family," she notes. "Knowing that, everything else comes second. We've each given up stuff we loved in order to not work at the same time. I'm fortunate to be in a place now where I get to find the material -- a book or script -- early and develop it. So I know ahead of time that I’m going to be working on this job at this time. And we can plan around it."
3. Reynolds' hilarious fatherhood tweets are all made-up, and not actually about their daughters
Reynolds, 40, has been known for his hilarious tweets on being a dad, including this classic from January.
The Deadpool star recently told ET that he sometimes runs his jokes by Lively first, and she confirms this to Glamour, adding that they're actually not based on real-life experiences.
"When he says 'my daughter,' he's never, ever talking about her," she clarifies, referring to James. "Everything is a completely made-up scenario. He'll run them by me sometimes just to make me laugh. But oh, I'm so in love with him when he writes that stuff. I mean, I’m in love with him most of the time, but especially with that."
4. Lively is "defensive" when it comes to talking about her love for Reynolds
Lively is very aware of her and her husband's reputations -- the notion that they have the "perfect" marriage and family -- and admits she strives to not feed into it in order to avoid the "eye-rolls."
"I said, 'Most of the time,' because if I say, 'I'm so in love with him all the time,' then you get that eye-rolling, 'Oh, her life is so great, she's so perfect,'" she points out, referring to her earlier quote about Reynolds' tweets. "So it's, like, my defense mechanism."
"There's never a time when I'm like, 'I don't really love you,'" she further explains about Reynolds. "Still, in a sound bite? It can be eye-roll-y. I have to learn to stop being defensive."
5. Lively and Reynolds treat each other as friends -- especially when they're fighting.
Lively says the secret to resolving her conflicts with her husband is the fact that the two aren't afraid to be open with one another -- thanks to them being friends first before getting involved romantically.
"In other relationships, if something came up, I would call my girlfriends or my sister, and say, 'Hey, this is what he did -- what should I do?'" she recalls. "Where with him, we were friends for two years before we were ever dating. And I treat him like my girlfriend. I’m like, 'Hey, this happened. It upset me. This is how I feel. What do I do?' And he does the same for me. He treats me like his best buddy."
6. Lively and Reynolds are both "shy," and sometimes have a tough time talking about one another
Despite both being superstars, the blonde stunner say she and Reynolds are actually both "really shy." She admits to getting extreme anxiety the night before interviews, because she worries how the writer will "spin" her image.
"My husband and I are really shy people who express ourselves best when we're acting, when we're hiding as someone else," she notes. "So the fact that very shy people have to share that shy person with the world -- and are sometimes hurt by it -- it’s very weird emotionally. Anyway, champagne problems."
7. Lively is inspired by her Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants co-stars America Ferrera, Alexis Bledel and Amber Tamblyn
Lively and her Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants co-stars have made no secret that they're still close after filming their beloved 2005 film, and clearly, she has a lot of love for their close-knit group.
"I'm grateful we are still friends," she says. "They're three of my very best friends and role models. They’re so artistic, and they're activists. They’re wives, and most of us are mothers. They’re producers, directors, and writers. They’re not limited. They're unlimited."
8. Lively has a mantra for life
When asked if there are any words she lives by, Lively reveals that it's the adage, "This too shall pass."
"It's a reminder -- if something is painful, it will pass," she explains. "But also, if something is beautiful, knowing that this too shall pass makes you hold on to the moment. Savor it."
ET sat down with Reynolds on Sunday at a press junket for his upcoming action comedy, The Hitman's Bodyguard, when he gushed about his wife's on-screen abilities, and why she doesn't need any advice from him whatsoever.
"Why would I need to help my wife with training or fighting tips? My wife can train and kicka** all on her lonesome," Reynolds said. "She don't need me for any of that."
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