'90 Day Fiancé': Caleb Tells Alina He Doesn't Want to Date a Little Person
By Antoinette Bueno
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Caleb and Alina's 13-year internet romance came to a heartbreaking end on Sunday's episode of 90 Day Fiancé: Before the 90 Days. After Alina kept pushing Caleb for an answer on where he wants the relationship to go after their rendezvous in Turkey, Caleb admitted that he had serious reservations about dating a little person and what that would entail for the rest of his life.
Caleb and Alina met in Turkey this season after communicating online for over a decade. The two first connected when they were 15 years old on social media but lost touch for 13 years. They then amazingly matched on a dating app, which reignited their feelings for one another. But while they definitely got close during their trip and had chemistry, as the trip came to a close, Alina wanted to know where their relationship stood before she went back to her home in Russia and he went back to his home in Arizona. Caleb said he needed more time, but Alina no longer found his answer acceptable.
"I feel like I've been very patient with Caleb so far," she told cameras. "I've always heard this, 'I need more time, not too soon,' and I respected it. But now, it's not gonna work -- this excuse -- anymore."
With only two days left together in Turkey, Caleb still couldn't give Alina the commitment that he was her boyfriend.
"It's not something I'm against," he told her about being exclusive. "It's just been a question for me of the right person. And I've been trying to assess that in you. I want to experience what life is like with you more. And I wish this wasn't being put to the question right now, because I feel like this is being forced on me. But, if it's a on-the-spot answer, then... It's not that simple, Alina. If we could make this trip another week or two, I might be able to say yes. If you were in America with me, I could maybe say yes."
"It's out of respect for you that I'm taking my time," he continued. "You have needs that need to be met. You need someone who can pay you attention and help you in those ways. I don't want to take that lightly. So one big reason I'm taking time is to make sure I can be the person who can do that. I think you deserve someone who can do everything you need in terms of being your aide."
Caleb said he didn't like the question of being exclusive being forced on him.
"I am trying to get what I want, which is you, in the proper way," he told her. "That's why I'm saying give me more time. But, that isn't apparently what can happen here, because you need to leave with an answer. And if that's what you need, I respect that, but this is what I need. I need more time. And it hurts me. I feel like we have so much here that I wish you could wait."
But Alina wasn't buying it and said Caleb was being "very vague" about her.
"I think when a guy's in love, he just goes and gets what he wants," she told him. "I just can't go back and everything is back to normal, how it was before. I can't handle this. I think I stated it clearly -- yes or no. ... I don't think you love me. You don't love me. You're not even in love with me."
"I'm not asking Caleb to marry me, or to move to Russia immediately," she added to cameras. "But, it kind of hurts that he doesn't know by now. Does he want to be with me or not? I know I want be with him. And I just really feel played."
Caleb slept on the couch that night, but the next day -- their last day together -- the two made an effort to enjoy their time with one another. Later, while lying in bed, Caleb got brutally honest with Alina, telling her that he doesn't see himself dating a little person for the rest of his life because of the hardships that would entail.
"I know when I say I need time it sounds flippant, like, I am putting you off as if I don't care," he told her. "The reason I need time is because this is all new to me. Like, I really like you, but I'm not used to dating little people. I told everyone it'd be no big deal that we were different, but the reality is there were challenges there for me. I'm a bachelor, I'm very independent. I'm used to doing me. So it scares me a little bit to imagine being with you long-term."
Alina replied, "I don't understand. When you love someone, it shouldn't be so hard to help or whatever. It just becomes a part of your daily life, no?"
But Caleb said it was more than that.
"I just don't know if the life I want for myself is one of helping someone so much," he said. "Because my life has been so different than that."
Needless to say, Alina was disappointed and heartbroken.
"I understand it might be scary, but I'm kind of tired of that, of people being scared to be with me because I require, like, help or whatever," she told him. "But this is the first reason, always. And I thought you were different."
Caleb responded, "I thought I was, I didn't think this would be a problem. But the reality is this is a struggle I'm facing. But I don't know what to say beyond that."
He then told cameras, "I deeply care about Alina, so it really tears me apart to see her like this. I wish she could see that I've been trying, that I put in all this effort. But at this point, I can't commit to Alina."
The two shared an emotional hug, and Alina said she felt Caleb was afraid of change and afraid to take big risks in life.
"Coming to Turkey was a big risk and I knew that this outcome was very possible," she said. "But I just really hoped for something different. Something better."
The next day, the two said goodbye to each other at the airport and Caleb acknowledged that he could end up regretting his decision. Alina also couldn't promise him that she'd keep in touch.
Alina told cameras, "I thought he would be more understanding and see past my disability because it's been 13 years of us talking and building a great emotional connection. The worst thing is that I'm not just losing the potential man who I can spend my future with, but I'm also losing one of my best friends. I don't know if we are gonna see each other again, and this is the most hurtful part. ... I'm just sad that he couldn't love me as I loved him and wanted him to love me."
For his part, Caleb was also struggling.
"I feel like Alina and I really came close together," he said about still having feelings for her. "We shared our vulnerabilities, and we really came to understand each other on a deep level. So there's a greater sense of loss right now going home that almost makes me wish I hadn't opened up in the first place to risk being hurt. But at the same time, that's the price you sometimes have to pay."
"I'm worried that I got in my head too much and didn't allow myself to appreciate what we had as much as I could've," he continued. "And I feel like when I wake up tomorrow, I think I'll really question if this was the right choice. I might realize that I was just afraid. I think it might haunt me for a while."
Meanwhile, Alina was recently fired by TLC due to her past racist social media posts that have resurfaced. In a statement to ET, TLC said they've cut all ties with 27-year-old Alina due to the offensive posts, which mock different races and religions.
"TLC discontinued filming with Alina Kozhevnikova following the recent discovery of her past social media statements," the statement reads. "She will not appear on the upcoming Tell All, any future seasons of the franchise and starting next month, she will no longer appear on 90 Day Fiancé: Before the 90 Days. TLC does not tolerate racism or discrimination of any kind."