On the agenda was her first one-on-one date, a spicy group date and little game of strip dodgeball. And while Yosef survived the drama on night one, this week teased he's got more up his sleeve. The contestant is seen in promos calling Clare's actions "completely unacceptable." Is he the guy who yells he expected more from the "oldest Bachelorette"? All answers point to yes.
But the Yosef spectacle isn't the only thing fans have to look forward to. This week, Dale told the camera he doesn't want Clare to "waste" time with the other men (this happened on their FIRST DATE!), Clare had the guys play a game of strip dodgeball, and she suddenly sent a man home mid-date. Then, since the theme of this season is Dale, the promo hinted at the men's jealousy of his connection with Clare... as they start to question whether the pair communicated before filming.
ET was live blogging this week's episode. Scroll down for minute-by-minute updates on everything that went down.
Dale, Dale and a Strike
Ooo, this promo is mighty FIRE.
The men are questioning Dale's intentions, whether he and Clare connected on social media, and what's going on between them.
"I'm not trying to hide anything," Clare insists, as the men stage a STRIKE and consider walking out.
"It's almost like a bomb just dropped," one constant teases.
The promo ends with Clare yelling about the men she didn't settle for (Yosef!) but we are all about this Dale talk.
"When Dale stepped out of the limo, I felt like I met my husband... ever since, I have seen such a deeper, more intimate side of Dale," Clare tells the camera, gushing over their chemistry. "I still can't put words to it."
She has a treat for Dale, taking him over to a moody corner of the resort, blindfolding him and showering him with "physical touch." "Thank you for being so good to me," she whispers.
"It will only get better," he promises, as Clare says it's "magical."
"These are my dreams coming true," she raves.
"First and foremost, Dale," Clare tells the camera.
She and Dale head off to chat in front of another fountain, where Clare tells Dale she wants to know it all.
"When I needed someone the most, I felt like I was left high and dry," he says of his past relationships.
Clare remembers how lonely she felt in quarantine, especially with everything she went through with her mom. Dales notes how he prayed for them. (So, he was checking up on her during quarantine, too?)
"I just want somebody to like, little bit take the weight of the world off my shoulders," Clare says.
"Everything that has gone on has made everything harder... I'm not going to rush or push you," Dale replies.
Rules of Engagement
Blake not-so-casually reenters the group with his rose. "I definitely feel good about it," he says.
Eazy says there are "no rules of engagement" and now it's time for Clare's one-on-one time with Dale.
Clare wants to rehash the events of the night before, when Blake crashed the date. "It was definitely a risk... but it was something that again, I thought was amazing of you to do. I don't want you to worry. I don't want you to question anything," she says.
"As a matter of fact, I have a rose for you," Clare reveals. Wow, girl, OK. "Everything you are doing is so right."
Clare really knows how to make a man sweat. Wow. "Sorry for not kissing you last night," she apologizes, and it's all good.
So, we are very convinced at this point Yosef is the man who yells at Clare for being "old," but we only have eight minutes left of this episode, so we feel like that is going to wait until next week.
One dude tries to pull Clare aside first at the cocktail party (having learned his lesson from the first group date), but she stops him. She NEEDS to talk to Blake.
Chasen summarizes what happened with Brandon, and Yosef says he would have told Clare, "I liked you a lot more before you humiliated me."
Yosef says he would "never in a million years" participate in the dodgeball date. "It just seemed classless... yeah, for sure [I'm going to bring it up]. It's just left a really bad taste in my mouth," he tells the men.
"It's only fair to let her know how I'm feeling tonight at the cocktail party," he says.
"I just want men here that are here for THIS Clare," the Bachelorette tells the camera. Who is the other Clare?
Anyway, she tells the guys she sent Brandon home, and that she knows what she wants (a man here for THIS Clare).
With that, THIS Clare picks up the rose and gives it to Chasen. (Sorry, we can't get out of this cycle.)
Why Are You Here?
"I don't think that I want to pursue this anymore," Clare tells Brandon. "Is it OK if I walk you out?"
"I'm not saying Brandon's a bad guy, but I had to send him home because I know what I'm looking for," she explains to the camera. She says she's having heartfelt conversations with the others. "Brandon can't even think of one thing that he likes about me? Why are you here?"
Digging a Grave
Clare sits down with a red team member, Brandon, who tells Clare he "knew" he had to be on The Bachelorette when he found out it was her... except he can't seem to think of any qualities that drew him to her.
"You're just so beautiful," he says.
"Is there anything else..." Clare asks, to which he says he doesn't have a "specific answer."
He's digging himself into a grave and SWEATING IT OUT as Clare asks him to tell her anything about her besides her looks. She mentions how the other guys have been vocal about what they like about her, and this man says "they didn't know that before the show."
This is not going well.
We pick up with this big confrontation over who has the biggest balls. "If you guys could give me like, one minute," Clare asks.
The guys walk away heated. "It's not OK," Eazy tells the camera.
Chasen talks about the "set rules" of the strip dodgeball game... OK.
Clare tells Blake she doesn't want to disrespect the guys, but she appreciates him coming. Blake goes in for a kiss and he is DENIED. Awkward!
"You can't go in for it right now," Clare says. "Come on!"
They awkwardly part ways and Blake is depressed.
"I wanted to come in here and really show balls," Blake tells Clare, and Jay tells the rest of the group what just happened.
They are OUTRAGED. Where was this energy from the guys on the first group date?
Blake says he doesn't care about the heat he's going to get from the guys, and they all stand up, ready to confront him.
Comb That Beard and Get On Out There
Clare connects with another man whose name we SWEAR we will learn by next week. (But also, let's be realistic, please.) She reveals she didn't go to prom, and this man's name is... Chasen.
They kiss and Chasen feels "electricity." Does he know that is the word Clare has been using to describe her connection with Dale? Would really like to know.
Flash to Canadian Blake, who took walking home "naked" a punishment for losing the dodgeball game. He combs his beard, puts on a shirt and makes his way to Clare, who is talking to some guy about his home gym. Riveting!
Apparently this man is dodgeball superstar, Jay. "Didn't you lose?" Jay asks Blake, who surprises him and Clare.
Clare feels a little bad that the blue team had to go home, but not that bad. Eazy takes her away to talk first -- but ends up giving her a foot rub. Wow, we are not a fan of feet, but we are impressed.
"Eazy's really easy to talk to," Clare says. We see what you did there. She says the foot rub gave her a pep in her step. We see that too, Clare.
Poor Canadian Blake
The blue team returns to the suite to tell the rest of the guys what happened, and poor Canadian Blake has to tell the camera how he's feeling while still only wearing a jockstrap.
Oh Here Is Some Nudity
The red team secures a victory, and one man on the blue team gets VERY CONFIDENT and removes his jockstrap. "You said you wanted a man with balls?" he asks. Oh, OK. Sure.
Black boxes are GALORE as Clare gives the losing team naked hugs and sends them on their way. She'll spend the rest of the date with the red team.
We do not yet know who Jay is, but apparently he is very good at dodgeball. He is winning this match for the red team, which means blue losses. Off with their shirts!
"Their loss but my win," Clare teases.
Blue loses again, and Clare instructs them to take off their socks. Blue loses AGAIN, and Clare makes the RED team take off their shirts. Then, she tells the blue team to take off their shorts. Womp womp... there's not much left.
Chris welcomes the men to "Clare's Extreme Dodgeball Bash," but Clare apparently has another idea. "I think we should play strip dodgeball," she says.
"This is my game, these are my rules," she says. Demar jokes about Clare seeing his "man goodies" and the guys get ready to play.
Chris commentates the game to a crowd of... no one and the game gets started.
The group plays enough dodgeball to get sweaty before Chris Harrison holograms in to divide them up into teams for the night's big tournament.
The men are feeling the pressure -- but they're about to feel it a little more. Hello, jockstraps!
Group date No. 2 -- and Clare is looking for a man with balls. "I'm ready to lay my balls on the table," some man says. We think he's the guy who choked Clare's hands to death on night one.
"I want a man who... wants to win me over," Clare says. So... dodgeball!
This Old Thing?
All of the sudden Clare whips out the dress she wore on Juan Pablo's Bachelor finale. "This dress means nothing to me," she says.
"We should burn that thing," Jason suggests. FIREEEEEEEE.
They toss the dress in the fire, and Clare says this date was "the most successful one-on-one ever."
Jason calls the dress "ugly" and Clare hilariously says she thought it was cute. She did look good in it, but hooray for LETTING GO.
2 for 1
Clare wants to schedule another session next week and learn more about Jason's demons, so she gives him a rose.
They kiss, and Jason is THRILLED. Therapy AND a relationship? What a score!
"That's who I want," he says.
We are so curious what Jason went through as a child, and we're sure Clare knows the real story because she has been SO GOOD at getting him to open up. What's the story? We need to know!
Jason tells Clare she's helping him open up. "It was so much easier just to talk to you," he says.
"There's nothing that scares me," Clare says. "I have stood at the foot of my father's bed while he was taking his last breaths... I'm a strong-a** woman. ... Bring it."
Clare Crawley, Ph.D
Clare tells Jason he CAN trust her with whatever demons he has. "The stuff you wrote on the tile, that's in my past the kind of guy I've been attracted to," she confesses, revealing she's been with players in the past who pushed her away.
"That's who I've been," Jason says. "That's not who I want to be."
Jason is getting DEEP and Clare is VERY understanding. "It's self-defense. Protective," she tells him. Wow, did she get her Ph.D in psychology during quarantine? Girl is dropping KNOWLEDGE.
Dark, Heavy Stuff
Now, time to read their homework. Clare reads an emotional letter she wrote to her younger self, tearing up.
Jason also gets honest about the "damaging" things he's seen in the past, "but there comes a time to face our demons." He ends his note hoping for unconditional love, and it is a JOURNEY of a letter.
"Is there like, dark, heavy stuff?" Clare asks.
"Yeah," Jason confirms, saying he's been alone for the past two years because he's been holding it all in. He didn't want to be a player, but he was afraid to open up. "There are some demons... I don't want anyone to see," he tells Clare.
"I do have genuine feelings for Clare," Jason confesses to the camera. "But I don't know if she feels that way."
Clare, the Counselor
Clare and Jason trade off listing insults they've heard about themselves, and Jason admits he believed them.
"I feel like we should let go of these and let's go throw them against the rocks," Clare says. We feel like she is just making up this date as she goes, and we are SO ENTERTAINED by it.
Clare should really consider a career in counseling, because now, all of the sudden, Jason feels comfortable opening up.
Clare is leading the date because COVID -- and asks Jason if he wants to do some "breathing or screaming." He chooses screaming and they SCREAM.
Then, Clare says it's now time to open up about things that hurt them, that they let go of. Jason says he has his past "for a reason." "This is tough," he shares. "This is the scariest thing I've ever done in my entire life."
Wow, this man has some SKELETONS in his closet.
Jason used to play football and weighed 325 pounds, but that is NOT the reveal he has planned for Clare on this date.
She kicks things off by noting how she used to cover up the hard stuff she's gone through, and we're feeling it, but also wondering why Jason got cheated out of a day part of the date? Are they skipping that this season?
Clare asks Jason if he watched her on Juan Pablo's season and he says no. JK, he says he saw the ending. "Tonight, we're going to practice letting go," Clare says.
The next morning, the guys are hanging out BY THE POOL. BECAUSE THERE ARE SO MANY POOLS.
Jason gears up for his date by reading a note from Clare and it is long. Producers make him read it out loud, but then smartly have Clare read it out loud. She wants him to write a letter to younger self in advance of the date. Hooray for homework!
Jason is NOT HAPPY about it, because he hates "tough" and "vulnerable" conversations.
He doesn't like to open up about his deepest, darkest secrets -- but looks like Clare is going to make him.
Our presumptive season villain Yosef is a Debbie Downer, concluding the date by noting how disappointed he was in Clare laying down the law. He calls her immature and we are not down with his assessment of the situation. Whatever, dude!
The date comes to a close, and Clare says it was a "hard decision" on who to give it to. It's our guy, Riley! WAHOO, good 4 u, boy!
"I feel great right now," Riley says. "It feels great to know I'm going to be here next week. There will be more time with Clare. I just have to take advantage of it."
Dale is FLABBERGASTED (we're guessing -- he actually doesn't really have that much energy). But he does admit he was shocked not to get the rose.
A Man Right There
Finally, Clare starts to realize that some of the guys could give Dale a run for his money -- just in time for our new favorite, Riley.
He apologizes to Clare for not jumping out of his seat, and then treats her to a "high school prom"-type slow dance.
Riley is asking Clare what she wants in a husband, and then he goes in for a kiss. "As you were saying?" he asks ... but Clare admits she was distracted, and he gets distracted, and it's all adorable and we love it.
"At the end of the day, you want someone who's always going to have your back. I am the first line of defense. I am the last stand. That is just the way it is," he tells her. MUSIC TO CLARE'S EARS.
"A man right there!" she gushes.
Clare opens up to one man about how she found herself in Bachelor Nation, revealing she used The Bachelor as a way to exit an abusive relationship.
"In the end of that season, my voice came out and it felt so damn good. And it propelled me into this world of growth and self-discovery and wanting better for myself," she says. "I know I have one of the greatest hearts in the room. I have so much to share, and I have so much to give, and I want that with a man."
Back at the ... suites (What do we call this?) Canadian Blake is hoping he'll get the first one-on-one date. But he doesn't. It's Jason.
Dale was BOTHERED by Clare feeling like no one wanted to talk to her, so he's looking forward to showing her how she feels.
They sit down and kiss, and she tells Dale that he scares her -- but in a good way, because her feelings are so strong. "I totally have feelings for you," she says.
"I totally feel the same way, I'm not going to lie," Dale replies. "Hell yeah, there's no denying it, and I'm not going to shy away from it."
He tells the camera that he wants Clare to know that she doesn't have to "waste" time with anyone else.
Yosef tells Clare she's "crazy" to think the men aren't all there for her, and WTF? We did not appreciate that tone.
Dale stops him, and steals Clare away. Yes, goodbye Yosef.
The other guy we like tells Yosef not to speak for him, and we're all for this fighting. Update: his name is Riley. We like Riley!!
Clare makes a fabulously dramatic walk back to the group. "I'm a little bit taken aback," she tells the men. "There was the longest awkward silence... and I just sat here and was embarrassed and had to... does anybody want to spend time with me?"
"If you guys all want to hang out with each other, you can do that, and I can go home and go to bed," she continues. "It hurt me."
One guy says he didn't know it was TIME to steal her away.
Enter Dale, who says he'll NEVER restrict how he feels in front of the other men. "I've been on cloud nine."
Clare worries she broke up the "bromance" and this opera man, Bennett, pretty much confirms that she did.
Clare says she wants to know more about him, but she's clearly upset that no one wanted to talk to her. "I just want to be present... but I'm not somebody that holds stuff in," he tells Bennett. "Why didn't those guys get up? ... If you guys want to bro out, you're in the wrong place."
She gets up and walks away.
The guys all joke about getting the rose on tonight's date and Clare looks STUNNING in a blue one shouldered dress. We have never seen so many one-shouldered looks on a season, and we're not mad about it.
Coming into the night part of the date, Clare has Dale on her mind, but first she has to tell everyone else how impressed she is by then. "You guys opening up and sharing with me meant so much to me," she says.
The group cheers, makes small talk and then there's an AWKWARD AS HELL silence. "Does anybody wanna... step up to the plate?"
Harvard opera man says "sure," and Clare notes how "sad" it is that no one got up.
Chris tells the men the next section of the date is the MOST IMPORTANT love language, quality time. However, it doesn't look like the guys are too interested.
"Does anybody want to spend time with me?" Clare asks in the preview before commercial break.
Dale's gift is dog perfume??? Not what we would expect, but we're sure he's going to make up for it on the next part of the date -- Physical Touch.
This is very SENSUAL and Clare is loving all this attention after seven months of quarantine. Clare boasts about knowing who everyone is by their smells.
Then it's time for Dale, who wants to show her his "strong presence." "Oh, I know this smell," Clare whispers, running her hands over his body.
"It's touching on a deeper level," Shemar Moore says. "I'm jealous."
Now we're thinking the dog perfume was actually PERFECT because Clare loves smells...
"Wait, something's happening!" one guy lounging by the pool yells as the group date guys run through the resort, trying to find special items to give to Clare.
One man explains that this is for the second part of the Love Language challenge, GIFTS. (Is that the formal name for it?) The men actually get very personal, and we are OBSESSED with the guy whose motto is "Don't complain, just figure it out." We wish he told that to his castmates when they all were babies about getting COVID tests.
Clare has no chill as Dale talks about how committed he is to giving her everything he has, "physically, emotionally." "I don't care who is watching," Dale says. "I'm here."
Clare tears up, revealing it's been a long time since she's heard kind things from men. "I'm just not used to it, so it feels good," she explains.
The men speak to Clare, who is standing in a tower like Rapunzel. (Is this some sort of joke because she is a hairstylist?)
Clare is IMMEDIATELY woo'd by the guys. She tells one guy to "be that onion" and open up to her, and smiles at the rest. "Behind their words was sincerity. I'm SO excited to hear from Dale," she tells the camera.
Jordan, a 26-year-old who looks like Shemar Moore's cousin, just said something but we don't remember what it was because we were thinking about how much he looks like Shemar Moore.
The guys meet Clare at some other part of the resort, where they're reunited with Chris Harrison. What a surprise! Clare is looking for someone to speak to her heart, so today's date is all about love languages.
Chris leaves the guys with the first date card and there are too many men for us to list them here. Do you even know their names at this point? All you need to know is Dale is on the date.
Pools on Pools
Clare is feeling great after the first night so she's relaxing in a pool and talking about Dale.
Then the guys "move in" to their suites at La Quinta and talk about all the pools. We see the pools and we would like to be sitting in those pools right now.
The men celebrate existing amid coronavirus with some champagne, and Chris Harrison walks in to ask the guys how it feels to hug people.
Then, he singles out Dale, because he knows that's what we want to see. "I'm excited," he says.
It's episode twoooooo and the drama is here! We get a quick recap of night one aka the Clare and Dale show but a sneak peek shows there might be trouble in paradise.
The Bachelorette airs Tuesdays at 8 p.m. ET/PT on ABC.