Duane "Dog" Chapman wasn't ready to celebrate anything after the death of his wife, Beth Chapman, in June.
In a sneak peek at the season finale of his reality show, Dog's Most Wanted, Chapman and his family are seen talking through plans for Beth's memorial services following her death after a lengthy battle with cancer.
"Nowadays when you go to a funeral, it's called a celebration of life," Chapman tells some of his children and Beth's friends, who are spending time together after saying their goodbyes to the beloved matriarch. "We do things weird and we're gonna keep doing them weird. I'm not celebrating sh*t. I think we need to mourn a little before we start celebrating, OK?"
Rainy, Beth's best friend, chimes in to remind the family that the funeral plans should focus on Beth's wishes.
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"This is very fresh. She's just passed away not 12 hours ago," she says. "I think that we have to just let this settle in on people. This has to be the way she wanted it."
Before making any further plans, Chapman decides to turn in for the night after a restless and emotional few days. "I don't think my tear ducts have any tears left," he tells the group. Watch the video above to see more.
"I cannot believe that she is gone. This is not possible," he told the crowd, growing visibly emotional. "I never admitted that she was going to die. I wanted to keep her alive... She will never be dead to me. She is [just] in another place."
See more on the services in the video below. The season finale of Dog's Most Wanted airs Wednesday at 9 p.m. ET/PT on WGN America.