Kim Kardashian West is opening up about being robbed at gunpoint in October 2016.
The 38-year-old Keeping Up With the Kardashians star appeared on The Alec Baldwin Show, where she revealed how she’s different since the terrifying incident.
"My life has definitely changed a lot in the last two years from that experience and just wanting more privacy," Kim said, before revealing that she “almost lost” herself in the year following the robbery.
"In the last three months, I feel like I've come out of my shell a little bit more, back to who I was," she shared. "... I was never depressed, but I wasn't motivated to get up and work like I used to. It shook me."
"I was literally – my mom [Kris Jenner] had to come over and say, 'Will you get out of bed? Will you put on something else other than sweats? Put on a little bit of makeup, feel like yourself again,'" Kim recalled of her post-robbery emotional state.
Though she’s certainly doing better now, Kim still blames herself a bit for the robbery, where thieves tied her up and gagged her.
"I'm totally a realist. So I know, you post on social media your locations, your jewelry, your bags, what you're doing, where you're going, your cars, your stuff. I would always talk about my stuff," Kim admitted. "There was a lot of me that measured who I was by how much I had."
She continued, "I thought, 'Oh, I'm worth so much.' So that changed in me. And, that needed to change in me, so I'm grateful for the experience.”
While gratitude may seem like an unusual emotion after going through a trauma, Kim is happy with who she’s become since the incident. "
"Even though it was horrific, and I wouldn't wish it upon anyone, it really did deeply change me to where now I feel like I can get back to myself, I can put on makeup and heal," she explained.
Since the robbery, Kim revealed that she has dealt with feeling like she was constantly in danger, something she had never felt before.
"I was so scared for anyone to know where I was. Like, if I went to a restaurant, I thought, 'OK, they're gonna post a photo of me online, know that I'm at this restaurant, know that my home's open and that they can go and maybe rob my home or rob this or know I'm here,'” Kim said.
"I always had that thought in my mind of just danger," she added. "I never thought about anything scary before, until then. I felt like I was living in a bubble, and that opened me up to so much."
Though she’s mostly moved on with her life, her day-to-day routine does look a bit different.
"Now my life is six security [guards] outside of our house at all times, and a few security when I travel, always 24/7 outside my door," she said. "I just move totally differently now."
While on the show, Kim also discussed her previous need to “be seen” out in public and how that changed since marrying Kanye West.
"It started with Kanye, because he lived a more, you know, his work life is very public, but then, like, when he was off, he was very private. And I was -- everything had to be public for me back then. So I had to kind of flip it," Kim said. "Now it's like, on my time off, I’m like, 'Where are the locations I can go eat, go on vacation where no one will see us?'"
"All I want is privacy. I never thought that I would be at that point," she added.
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