Nicole Kidman on the Death of Her Father: 2014 Is Not My Favorite Year

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Nicole Kidman can't say goodbye to the year 2014 fast enough.

The Oscar-winning actress is still grieving from the loss of her father, clinical psychologist Antony Kidman, who suffered a heart attack in August.

"Personally [it's been] really really really hard," the usually private Nicole tells Guardian Australiain a new interview.  "My family underwent a massive tragedy. So not my favorite year. But I try not to be ungrateful – I'm grateful to be alive."

PHOTOS: Stars We Lost in 2014

Next year, Kidman plans to stay close to her mother and sister, who are still based in Australia.

"We've gone through a really tough time this year as a family," she says. "It's so nice to be able to take care of each other."

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Aside from her personal life, Nicole also suffered a headline-making critical and commercial bomb with her film Grace of Monaco this year, in which she played the iconic Grace Kelly. Though, according to Nicole, the ups and downs of her career don't bother her so much because she doesn't "expect anything."

"My whole career is always a roller coaster," she explains. "I'm so random and spontaneous and unusual in my choices – I never expect anything."

But if we're judging by the early reviews, Kidman's latest film, Paddington, is already a winner. Kidman plays the villain in the film based on the beloved children's book by Michael Bond, about an evil taxidermist named Millicent who wants to see Paddington Bear stuffed.

"I hadn't made a film that had made people feel good for a long time," the 47-year-old actress admits. "I'd made films that are darker in tone. So, it’s really nice to be able to make a film where you can say: ‘yeah, bring your kids.'"

In October, Nicole talked about the tragic loss of her father to Ellen DeGeneres, and thanked all those who reached out to her.

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