It's been more than a year since Nikki Bella and John Cena called off their engagement and called it quits for good, but the 36-year-old WWE star is still reflecting on the end of such a significant romance in her life.
"The one thing I really regret about showcasing the breakup is that no one got to hear [John’s] voice, and it just seemed so one-sided," Nikki tells Health Magazine of sharing details of the split on her reality show, Total Bellas. "I felt like that wasn’t fair to him because he was on this journey with us from the beginning."
Nikki adds that Cena "never took one paycheck" for his time on Total Bellas, calling the move "beautiful."
"He was fully there to support me. I’ll never forget his support and his love," she recalls. "That’s what made me sad. I don’t want to say it became the Nikki show, but in a way it did because you didn’t get to see John anymore."
She goes on to note that her family never turned against her former fiance. In fact, in some ways it ended up being the opposite.
"I thought she made a big mistake!" Nikki's twin sister, Brie Bella, admits of her split.
Since the initial breakup, Brie has come around. "I did [think it was a mistake] for a long time because they were just such a lovely couple, and I thought they were such a perfect match," Brie explains. "Because I’m married, I felt like there are ups and downs in relationships, and you work on things -- you don’t just give up. But then, after the breakup, I started seeing that they both wanted different things. So then I approved of the breakup."
These days, Nikki is happily in a relationship with her former Dancing With the Stars pro, Artem Chigvintsev.
"In past relationships, I feel like I was always trying to be perfect and was walking on eggshells because I didn’t want to upset that other person or make them leave me," she admits. "Artem is the first person I’ve been with where I feel like I can be Nicole and never fear he’s going to leave me for it. We all have a little crazy in us, and he loves my crazy. He’s also the first person I’ve communicated everything I feel with. Brie was saying I’m almost too honest with him. But I’d rather him know everything."
She also reveals that while she's been candid in the past about wanting to immediately have a baby, things have changed somewhat for her in that department.
"I definitely want to be a mom one day, but I don’t want it now," she reveals.
Nikki also recently discovered that she suffers from polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS), which can affect her fertility.
"I’m in this unfortunate situation where I’m 36 and everyone is reminding me, 'It kills your fertility,'" she says. "I’m getting brown spots all over my face, acne, weight fluctuations, and hair loss. I actually just found out and was devastated. You research it, and there is no cure. I just pray I have some fertile eggs left and that I can still be a mom."
Nikki has frozen her eggs and still has plans to be a mom one day. "I am just not sure how soon," she confides.
And though she's still deeply in love with Chigvintsev, Nikki recently opened up to ET about their big fight on the new season of Total Bellas. Watch the clip below for more: