The 36-year-old comedian is a guest on Wednesday's episode of The Ellen DeGeneres Show, and opens up about her engagement to her now-husband, chef Chris Fischer, and whether she wants kids.
Schumer reveals she and Fischer got engaged on Feb. 10, the same day as DeGeneres' star-studded 60th birthday bash. Schumer and Fischer attended the party, along with celebrities like Kris Jenner, Kim Kardashian West, Kanye West, Chrissy Teigen, John Legend, Jennifer Lopez, Pink, Pharrell and Olivia Munn.
"Celebrities are supposed to be quiet when they're getting married. We got engaged that morning, so we were going around [the party] and going, 'We're getting married!" says Schumer, who secretly wed Fischer on Feb. 13 in Malibu, California. "We were going around and we were getting advice from everybody ... [I told] everybody who would listen. The waiters, the valet."
"I'm so married!" she adorably exclaims. "We've known each other about a year, we'd already been living together for like five months. And we knew. I was like, 'I'm done.' I locked it down."
Later in the show, Schumer also talks about children, and whether she could see herself being a mom sometime soon. "Here's the thing, I have never wanted kids," she admits. "And then I saw myself as a baby on your show and I thought, 'Who am I to deprive the world of such a beautiful baby?'"
Schumer is referring to the time she dressed up as a grownup infant.
"Yeah, so I think we're gonna do it," she quips. "Just use my genetics."
Just a day before her appearance on Ellen, ET caught up with Schumer at the premiere of her new comedy, I Feel Pretty, at the Westwood Village Theatre in Westwood, California, where she couldn't help herself from gushing over Fischer.
"I'm psyched I found that dude," she told ET's Kevin Frazier. "He's really supportive and excited for me, and I think he's really proud of the movie, too. And the message it sends."
We also spoke with Schumer about her new BFF, Oprah Winfrey. The two recently posed together for a photoshoot, and now, Schumer says she doesn't need any other friends... ever.