Kelly Clarkson Talks Writing Emotional Christmas Song Amid Divorce: 'I Was Crying My Face Off'

The singer filed for divorce from Brandon Blackstock in June 2020.

Kelly Clarkson is getting real this Christmas. During her televised NBC special, When Christmas Comes Around, the mother of two opened up about writing a new song for people who might be struggling during the holidays. 

Clarkson filed for divorce from her ex, Brandon Blackstock, in June 2020 after almost seven years of marriage. The exes share daughter, River, 7, and son Remington, 5. 

"The holidays come with a whole range of emotions. I'm going to be real with y'all, when I wrote this next song, I was crying my face off, which happens even at Christmastime, everyone," the 39-year-old singer shared during her special. "I'd just put my kids to bed, and I was just going through it, having a really hard time and it's been a really tough year for a lot of us."

Introducing her new song, "Merry Christmas (To the One I Used to Know)," Clarkson added, "I wrote this song for me but also because there aren't many holiday songs for people feeling alone or lost or just plain sad, other than Dolly Parton's classic, 'Hard Candy Christmas,' which we all love. It's about getting through a tough holiday. I absolutely love that song, and it allowed me to write this."

The emotional ballad talks about missing a past love during the holidays. 

"You aren't the one I'm missing, he left long ago/ But Christmas Eve my gift to me is dancing with your ghost/ So Merry Christmas, to the one I used to know," she sings. 

Clarkson previously opened up to ET about her unusual holiday album. 

"There are a lot of songs on there that aren't necessarily your, like, 'Let's play and get in a jolly mood' kind of vibe Christmas. Some are, 'Let's really feel all the feelings' Christmas songs," she told ET. "I think that's why I named it When Christmas Comes Around because I feel like that's a really good title because when Christmas comes around, we are all in different places."

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