Brandan and Mary are the most co-dependent couple in '90 Day Fiancé history and are alarmingly obsessed with one another.
90 Day Fiancé: The Other Way newcomers Brandan and Mary might be the most co-dependent couple in the franchise's history. On the season 5 premiere on Monday, viewers were introduced to the couple who video chat with one another 24/7 and whose jealous and obsessive behavior is alarming.
Brandan is 23 and lives in Eugene, Oregon, while Mary is 23 and lives in the Philippines. The two met on a dating site and quickly became obsessed with one another. Brandan felt Mary was out of his league and couldn't believe she reciprocated his interest, while Mary said Brandan looked like a mix between two of her favorite things -- Justin Bieber and Harry Potter. The two spend practically every second of the day on video call with one another, to the point where they watch each other go to the bathroom and watch one another sleep. For example, Brandan even video chatted with her while he was getting his teeth cleaned at the dentist just so she could watch him. They also send each other clothes with their body odor and sweat on it and Mary got multiple tattoos of his name.
Brandan and Mary both explained why they're so obsessed with one another, which stems from their respective pasts. Brandan had a hard childhood growing up. His mother lost custody of him when he was 15 years old after she failed her drug test. His two younger siblings were put into foster care and he was sent to live with his father in another state but the two didn't get along. Things were so bad between them that Brandan left and was living in his truck before his godparents found out. Currently, he's living in an RV outside of his godparents' house and does chores around the house for them since they don't charge him any rent.
"Mary's the first person who's ever made me feel good enough," he said. "She's the one who saved me from myself. My world was black and white before she came and now it's just colorful."
Meanwhile, Mary lives in a small village in the Philippines and said her bad relationship with her ex-boyfriend who cheated on her is what led her to being so jealous over Brandan. For example, she displayed irrational behavior during Brandan's teeth cleaning when she burst into tears when the dentist asked if Mary was his first love and he said no. Still, Brandan placated her, apologizing and noting that by "first love" the dentist meant his first girlfriend. Brandan acknowledged to cameras that her extreme jealousy over basically any female he interacts with caused fights. But Mary said it was Brandan's fault because he was "too friendly" to other girls.
"I love her so much but sometimes the obsessiveness is a double-edged sword," he said. "Parts of my relationship with Mary have become tumultuous and toxic. If mine and Mary's fighting doesn't get any better, I'm worried that me and Mary may not be able to make it work."
But the jealousy is definitely not one-sided. Mary told cameras that she lost her college dance scholarship because Brandan didn't want her dancing anymore and had to drop out. She also quit modeling due to his jealousy. Brandan also doesn't want her to hang out with her male childhood friends so she had to unplug her router and lie about having a blackout just so she could spend time with them without him knowing.
"I don't like just staying home doing nothing but I feel I need to give up all of that because if I didn't, I will lose Brandan because he can't stop overthinking," she said.
When her friends asked her if she was worried Brandan would control her life once he got to the Philippines, she said she wasn't and that their fights would stop once they weren't long-distance anymore. Mary, who's Catholic, said that if it didn't work out with Brandan, she would become a nun and "give [herself] to Jesus Christ."
"I know deep down Brandan gives me love and he just cares about me and my future," she said. "So when he gets here, I really hope that we will stop overthinking because I can't see myself without Brandan."
Later, Brandan invited his mother, Angela -- who went to rehab and has been clean for a year -- and his sister and brother to hang out before he moved to the Philippines to be with Mary. Both his sister and mother called him out over them not being able to spend time with him because of Mary's jealousy. The situation was incredibly awkward since Mary was watching and listening through a video call, though she muted herself. Mary cried when Brandan's family said he chose her over them and that she wasn't looking out for his best interests. All she could say back was that she knew they didn't like her in the first place. Angela said that Mary shouldn't get to have Brandan 24/7 and that their relationship was "pretty toxic."
"Toxic is when she doesn't want another female around that's your mother or your sister," Angela heatedly said. " ... It pisses me off."
Brandan said he understood where they were coming from, but he had to go to the Philippines and be with Mary. He said he had faith that things would be better after he and Mary were no longer long-distance.
Angela told cameras Mary was absolutely preventing her from having a relationship with her son after putting in so much work to rekindle what they lost because of her drug addiction.
"I'll be damned if I watch my son ruin his life over this obsession that he has with a girl that he's never met," she told cameras.